In the Cart

Today I made the mistake of visiting the beer aisle first on my shopping trip to Target. I wasn't even looking for beer; I was looking for club soda (to mix with gin). When I left the aisle empty handed, Ella announced quite loudly to the crowded dairy aisle, "Mommy, you forgot to buy beer!" "We don't need beer in our house (this is only because I just bought a case at Sam's Club)," I replied just as loudly for the benefit of the old lady staring me down. "But we always buy beer when we go to the store," Ella reminded me... and the other milk-buyers. By now the little one had picked up on the word of the day and began shouting, because she has no volume control, "Beer! Beer!" It then became a contest to see who could yell "beer" the loudest. The contest continued for about fifteen minutes, despite copious amounts of "shhhh"ing and escalating threats on my part. When the "beer" game got old, they turned to "Who can touch the other one's eyeball" (they were in one of those shopping carts where they can sit side-by-side), which was accompanied by my favorite game to play in public, "Are you crying or laughing?". By the time we left the store I was doing both. Trips like these are precisely why there's usually beer in my cart.

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