Friday, February 20, 2009

Dressing for Catholic School

I dropped Ella off at Catholic school this morning for her Kindergarten screening. The day started an hour earlier than usual, and, after directing my week's allotment of profanities at the alarm clock, I stumbled toward the bathroom where there was a tired looking woman with greasy hair squinting back at me. I thought Ella shouldn't start off with a knock against her because of her unkempt mother, so I decided I better wash my hair. I wanted to look "nice" for my first visit, so I put aside the glitter eye shadow the girl at the cosmetics store told me I was too old to wear, and instead chose respectable age appropriate makeup in pinks and browns. I even dried my hair, and parted it on the side, hoping to to make up for the nose piercing that I was certain didn't fit in with their conservative Land's End uniform policy. Now what to wear? I consulted my closet and passed on the three pairs of jeans with holes in them and the absurdly tight pants I let the woman at Express talk me into (wouldn't want to pop a button and hit a priest in the eye...) and went for a straight leg pair that looked like something Audry Hepburn would wear. I dug a plain gray turtleneck out from under my pile of my beloved tacky sweaters and pulled it on over my clean, parted hair. I looked totally respectable. And bland. My husband saw me pulling on the Converse tennis shoes I wear every day--the ones that look like they've been run over by a car several times--and suggested some flats instead. It was almost too much for me to bare, so I went with the multi colored reptile skin ones. After slipping on a religious bracelet from my mother-in-law and remembering to put on my wedding ring (no child out of wedlock here, no siree), I was ready to return to Catholic school.

As for my daughter, she chose a bright pink shirt, the green panty cover that went under a green jumper (which she tried to wear without the actual jumper), and all different color striped tights. On her feet were silver shoes that were covered in glitter. She went with a shiny silver coat and a purple hat.

Because of her August birthday, Ella's always going to be either really young or really old in her class. We won't hear back from the school for a couple of weeks, but it's okay if she doesn't get in this year--she might be ready for Kindergarten at Catholic school, but her wardrobe is not.
On an unrelated note, Addison stuck a carrot in her eye today. Why? Because I told her at lunchtime that carrots are good for her eyes.


  1. I wish Ella was going to MY Catholic school! I would gladly give her Mommy uniform infractions.

  2. There's always a style icon in evey kindgergarten class; Ella sounds like she'll fit the bill!

  3. So glad to see the bracelet is coming in handy! :)

  4. It must be scary knowing that your in-laws read your blog. But, alas, as a fan I await your next tale.
    You should probably just write a book. You know, like Bill Cosby or Irma Bombeck style. I laugh out-loud at some of your stories,(and I'm not paying for them, but I would).